


VIRM's Awful, No Good, Really Bad Era

by Neathra



Category: DARLING In The FRANXX (Anime)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Hypocrisy, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-25 15:35:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14980196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neathra/pseuds/Neathra
Summary: So, VIRM found themselves in the position of a parent tying to feed a stubborn child Glickno weed: the target of yelling, screaming, and violence. Why couldn’t the rest of the Galaxy just stop arguing about what was best for them?





	VIRM's Awful, No Good, Really Bad Era

A billion years ago, VIRM had thrown away the confinements of their mortal bodies and become a disembodied hive mind. Getting rid of all the issues that mortal bodies, and free will caused was the most freeing feeling that VIRM had every felt. They realized that this was the true way to live, and that everyone else in the Galaxy also needed to join them. The rest of the Galaxy did not agree.

So, VIRM found themselves in the position of a parent tying to feed a child Glickno weed: the target of slander and violence. Why couldn’t the rest of the Galaxy just stop arguing about what was best for them? They’re invitations never went smoothly, but like that long-suffering parent, VIRM was able to force the other races to join them.

 

Earth was a disaster. Both times. The first time, they got out thought by the Klaxo sapiens, a group of primitive material beings, who like most of the galaxy, couldn’t figure out that free will caused nothing but conflict, and it was all round better to just do what VIRM wanted. Not to mention they wanted to keep their bodies, and all the icky fluids those initialed.

Then, 60 million years later, they lost AGAIN. This time because they underestimated the assets’ desire for frivolous things like Love, or Affection, or Emotions. They did get away with Hringhorni but failed to reduce that aggravating planet to gravel. Not to mention, somehow, the humans got that Star Entity working properly, and annihilated the Vanguard fleet.

 

It didn’t get any better. No sooner had they gotten Hringhorni to the main fleet, then who showed up but the entirety of the United Galactic Armed Forces. Always a pain in VIRM’s side, the United Galactic Senate had taken a firm stance on the side of Free Will, and, apparently tired of being in the wrong, had launched an all-out assault on VIRM, and even with the spear, it was a rather one-sided battle.

With their ego bruised by Earth, and their army annihilated by the UGAF, VIRM retreated to the remnants of their home planet. They were still right. Bodies wore out and were messy, and as for free will, had the Senate ever listened to one of their own debates? So much arguing! No, their way was far better: VIRM made the decisions, and everyone else mindlessly obeyed.

Not that the assimilated races were always grateful. Every now and then they gathered enough presence of mind to grumble about how VIRM did things, or murmur about how much better the Astrals were.

 

VIRM hated the Astrals. The Astrals were an intrinsically paternalistic race, that had long ago also cast aside their physical bodies. However, this intelligent choice was undermined by keeping their individuality, and following a ridiculous policy of deciding what to do as a group. Apparently, the Astrals also offered to show the other sentient beings that they encountered how to transcend their bodies, but -get this – actually listened when those sentients said no.

So, naturally after the double disaster of Earth and the UGAF, who should turn up but the Astrals.

 _What do you want now?_ There was some fussing, as the Astrals quickly picked a speaker.

 _You really need to stop assimilating others. It is very sophomoric and condescending to think that you know best for everyone in the Galaxy._ Her voice that was both a single woman’s, and the voices of many different beings from across the Galaxy.

 _It’s not sophomoric if we really know best. Besides, what can you do about it?_ If the Astral had a physical form, VIRM was sure she would be rolling her eyes.

_We will stop you._

_No you can’t!_

 

Turns out that they could. Somehow, VIRM couldn’t be sure how, the Astrals surrounded them, and then pulled them apart, returning free will and individuality to all those who had joined them. The souls were given a choice,

_As there is no way to undo the harm VIRM has cause you, you must choice. We can guide you to the gates of the Here-After, or you can join us in our travels until this Universe ends._

It ended in about a 70/30 split. Most beings preferred to rejoin the dead in the next life, while some decided to spend the rest of this world with those stupid Astrals. As for what remained of VIRM, the Astrals “regretfully” absorbed them, and placed many restrictions on their motion.

 

VIRM skulked in the back of the Astrals' shared mind, glowering at anyone who came to close

 _Do you think they’ll ever learn?_ One Astral whispered to another, _I feel like a parent with a grounded teen._

Another shrugged _Hopefully, but they seem convinced that they’re somehow right._

Well, of course they did. VIRM was right!

**Author's Note:**

> Meanwhile... While the long suffering Astrals where dealing with VIRM, the UGAF, dropped by Earth, and has began helping them rebuild. They also offered Earth a seat in the Galactic Senate. 
> 
> Because while the Anime still has 3 episodes left, I felt the need to deal with VIRM now, and I felt the best way to make them answer for all evil they've done, is to strip them of everything and make them go sit in Time-Out. 
> 
> I especially enjoyed the voice I gave them. They shouldn't feel persecuted, but they do. (VIRM claims they are persecuted, because deep down everyone is jealous of them.)


End file.
